Tag Archives: Poet

Mologue of A Mathematician

It’s funny. As an expert in the area of mathematics, I can honestly say I eat, sleep, and live a life of numbers.

I had a dream last night that I was in a math class. It was just your typical Algebra course. The only thing that wasn’t typical was that the teacher was Black. And even further, he was a Black man that couldn’t control his class. It was mainly just two students though.

In my dream, they were ruining things for everybody. Because of them, the teacher ended up giving out a pop quiz. I saw some familiar faces in my dream and they were saying, “Chris, you’re gona take this, aren’t you? You’re not even in this class!” They knew that I would throw off their curve. Ironically enough, I actually did throw off their curve. I got a 100% and the next closest grade was an 82%.

The next class I came in late, because I was trying to decide whether or not I would even go. The teacher had already passed out the graded quizzes and asked me if I was Christopher Raglon. I’m assuming that he knew that, because he only had one paper left. Then he announced two things. First, he congratulated me on getting the top score in the class. Second, he announced that I wasn’t on his roll. Then he inquired of me as to whether or not that was a mistake. I told him no. Then I requested that he allow me to have 2 minutes of his class time. After that, I made my 2-minute address to the class.

For those of you who don’t know me, I feel confident saying that you will get to soon. My name is Christopher Raglon and as your teacher stated, I got the highest score on this pop quiz. Keep in mind that I did this and today is only my second day in this class. I noticed that there are two class clowns that seem to get yal into a lot of these pop quizzes. Well, I’m willing to counteract that action. As your teacher also stated, I’m not on his roll. He probably noticed when he tried to enter my grade. This is no mistake. I’m not on his roll, because I’m not enrolled in this class. I’m a math tutor. Now, don’t worry. I’m sure that your teacher will be willing to give yal the appropriate curve for this quiz. I’m here to let yal know that help is available. I charge fair prices and if you would like to request my services, I’ll be outside for awhile, after class. I’m willing to work with anybody, but the two class clowns.

Then I wrote my Twitter name (@TooDeepNot2Deep) on the drawing board, hung my perfect score quiz on the drawing board, and walked out.

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Conversations With Myself (Part 2)

“No sir you haven’t.”

That was her response and she added a smiling-laugh face. I honestly don’t know what to think about it. On the surface, I thought to myself “CHRIS! You haven’t messed up yet!!!!!” However, as I thought more into it, she could’ve been sarcastic, she could’ve been amused, and she didn’t offer an explanation. So it could very well mean that she’s done with me. Was it her way of saying I’m being “dra-ma-tic”? Did it really just mean “No. We’re good.”? Did she think it was cute that I showed concern?

I am scared. I’m scared out of my mind. It’d be different if I didn’t know her tendencies, but I KNOW that if she cares, she usually goes into detail. She didn’t even ask why I felt this way. She didn’t let me know if she felt the distance too. Keep in mind that…this is the same girl that asked if she got two Red Box movies, would I consider them to be Red Box or Red Boxes? She believes in detail! This is the same girl that MADE SURE to LET YOU KNOW that she waited a month, before she gave you her new number. If she wanted you in her thoughts, she’d let you know.

It’s funny. I’m just thinking that…Chris, you were ready to react no matter what she said. Chris, go on about your day. For once, let her text YOU. Don’t respond. DON’T RESPOND!!!!! If she’s thinking about you, she’ll text you and ask how you’re feeling. If she doesn’t, then move on! Move on and believe that God has someONE better for you or someTHING better for you to do. After all these years, Lavincia is STILL right. You get caught up on things that you should be passed. It’s a new week! Let it go. One way or another, trust Delvanique to make the next move.

Check out part one of this conversation!

Wrong End of A Love Song

Since the Daily Post prompt is ” is “Awe” I think this post is quite fitting. It’s about the moment in time that I realized things wouldn’t workout with this young lady and I. After a few months I realized how I didn’t always “play” things the right way and…I essentially just sat back in awe.

But I can’t be too upset. I would notice whenever she walked in the room, but I didn’t acknowledge her as she did with me. I remember the time she ran to me as I walked in the room. She was so excited to see me and she let not only me, but everybody in the room know it. But I just couldn’t match her energy; I didn’t match her energy.

I didn’t catch her when she fell and even worse, I didn’t help her back to her feet. I didn’t walk her to her car whenever we were out late. I didn’t take full advantage of the “us” moments she tried to create. I didn’t grab her butt when she wanted me to. I didn’t hold her hand long enough. I didn’t hold HER long enough. Whenever she pushed away I just let her go. I didn’t pull her back in and I didn’t resist.

I didn’t give her my jacket when she was cold. And even worse, I gave it to another girl. I could go on and ON about how I messed up, but it doesn’t matter anymore. I learned and I’m learning. Even further, I’m taking responsibility for my part in why “we” never got a chance.

I basically friend zoned myself as she tried with all her might to pull me out. She treated me like I was the rain maker to get her out of a drought. She wanted me to be the ice cream that made her scream and shout. She was just too bright for me. It just wasn’t right for me. I lost my way and she tried to be light for me.

For awhile, I was upset with her. I was upset with her, I was upset with God, and I was upset with myself; but the emphasis was on HER and God. I knew that I wasn’t perfect and I wasn’t trying to be. And maybe, just maybe that was the problem. That was MY problem. I didn’t think she was worth the effort of trying to be perfect for.

For more insight, see Conversations With Myself (Parts one and two).

Don’t Let The Bedbugs Bite

I can’t help but laugh. Can I tell yal a story about this bug that flew in my room? I kept hearing this noise, but I couldn’t figure out what it was. I started hearing the noise more clearly and it sounded like it was coming from behind my head (there was a window behind my head). I started getting the feeling that it was a bee, so I went to get some bee spray.

I came back in my room and I could see it. FORTUNATELY it wasn’t a bee, BUT…unfortunately I went to spray the bug and THE SPRAY CAN WAS JAMMED!!!!!!! Did I panic? No. I went to get a paper towel from my bathroom. Ok, well…maybe I went and got more than one paper towel (BUT that’s neither here nor there). FORTUNATELY, the bug was still in the same spot when I got back. And it only took me two swipes to get it!

The first time I missed and it landed on my pillow.

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I’m not going to lie to yal; I might’ve screamed a little bit. But ooooh that second time! That second time I was triumphant! I had a triumphant moment!

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I was like “ME! BY MYSELF!!!!!!!!” It would’ve been nice to have someone like her to come celebrate my triumphant moment with me, but ehhh dreams don’t always come true.

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And that’s my story of the night. Hope yal enjoyed your bedtime story.

All photos, links, and videos used are not my own. I take absolutely POSITIVELY no credit for them or their original thoughts.

The Service Is To DIE For!

Sigh I just got THE WORST SERVICE at Chili’s in Cedar Hill!!!!!!!!!!

So my mom reeeeeally wanted to go out to eat and she reeeeeeeeally didn’t want to go by herself. SHE KEPT ASKING ME WHAT I WANTED TO EAT!!!!!! Quite honestly, we didn’t ride to my sister’s graduation together and we drove two seperate cars. Oh yea, AND my sister drove her own car too. My sister went out to eat with her friends and guess what I did! I. Went. Home. I thought that my choice was preeeeetty darn clear. I planned on finding something to eat at home.

Anywho, she just kept passively bugging me about it, so…I went. Of course, those who have been around me know that every time my mom asked me what I wanted to eat, I found a new way to say “I don’t care.” By the time that we got in the car, the answer was something like “I don’t know how much more clearly I can put this. I don’t care. Surprise me. I am openly and willingly deferring my right to have a say in where we eat tonight.” And she was like “I don’t know what I want to eat.” And I was like “Well, that definitely defeats the purpose of us being out here.” She knoooows that she didn’t want me to pick. Because IF IT WAS UP TO ME, anybody who has been around ME knows that I would have just said Panda Express and called it a night. BUT…she finally chose Chili’s.

We walked into the Chili’s in Cedar Hill. We stood there for like 5 minutes and I started to question my own existence. I thought that maybe my fat body was invisible. Then the HOEstess FINALLY acknowledged our presence, BUT I don’t think that she acknowledged that we were customers (if that makes sense). That HOE…stess was all dry and came up to the front speaking REAL quiet as if she was in kindergarten giving a presentation in front of the class! And the bad part was that Chili’s wasn’t even crowded. Did I mention that already? They WERE NOT CROWDED! She ended up taking our name, but after 2 more minutes, we just left.

Step 2: (I’m almost done…kinda) We went to the International Household of Pancakes located in Cedar Hill. WE GOT THE SAAAAAAME SERVICE!!!!!! I. Was. Hysterical. I just accepted the fact that I must not really be where I think that I am. It was craaaaay! Ok, let’s back track a bit for a second. It was funny, because I opened the door for my mom and this couple that walked in. IHOP in Cedar Hill has two sets of doors. My mom waited for the other door to be opened for her. The girl knew what she was waiting for, but…I don’t think the guy did. We went through an awkward pause and then the girl said, “I think she’s waiting for the door.” Looks at her boyfriend Now I don’t know if he just didn’t want to open the door for my mom or what, but uhhhh I think homegirl need to find a new man if he don’t open the door for her. Another sidenote. Why does every female claim to be Independent until there’s a door that needs to be opened???

Anyhow, we get in IHOP and AT LEAST after an ALMOST 5 minute waiting period, the manager comes out and says to us “One moment please. I’m cleaning a table for you.” At least he noticed (in less time than that HOE…stess at Chili’s) that we were indeed NOT invisible. The funny part is that I had to convince myself of that while explaining the Chili’s situation to the girl that walked in with us. She was perturbed with the situation as well.

Let’s fast-foward to us getting our food now. We got our food and it was cold. My mom got them to get her more pancakes, but it was such a sketch night and I really didn’t want them spitting in my food (although it’s neither here nor there that they hadn’t already done so). So I just took my cold waffles, my cold eggs, and my sketch bacon and ate it all. WE HAD TO FIGHT TO GET THE BROAD ATTENTION JUST TO BRING US SOME SYRUP!!!!!!!! Oh yea, also we only got one drink from start to finish. Drake voice No refill! No refill! No refill! No No NO!

Despite ALLLLLL of this, my mom still left a tip. It was like $2. That upset me. Waiters make $2.13 an hour! Do you REALLY feel that she earned an extra hours worth of wages????

People often ask me why (as a young person) I don’t support a $15 an hour minimum wage and this is the story I usually tell them.

Was I Being Flirted With?

I walked into Dickey’s BBQ and the girl that worked there was like “I like your shirt!” I said, “thanks” and then she decided to keep the conversation going. She followed up with “You just don’t know how much I like it! That is SO me!” BLAH BLAH BLAH. Then she said, “I want it. I want your shirt.” Notice I didn’t put exclamation points on those sentences (hint hint). It was almost like she was commanding more than just my attention.

Once she said that, I made like I was about to take it off and said, “You can have it for a free sandwich!” Then she laughed. Keep in mind that this is the same young from the other encounter. I got my food, she wrung me up, and I went on my merry way. I got in my car, looked at my receipt, and I noticed that I was only charged a little under $2.50. I wasn’t charged for the sandwich yal! Was she flirting with me???

S.N: She casually told me her name while we were talking as she wrung me up. Obviously I’m writing all of this, because I thought she was cute.

Complacency In The Friend Zone

AND LORD, give me the courage to be a steadfast…UNMOVEABLE expert of all things pertaining to the Friend Zone like SO many that came before me!

Give me the PERSISTENCE of Steve Urkel! It took him NINE SEASONS to get the one he loved. Give me the likeability of Chase Matthews! Zoey traveled across THE WOOOORLD chasing after Chase. Put the Will in me to go find Grace! The humility to be in the Friend Zone and still show my face. Give me the strength of ROSS to just be friends with Rachel!!!!!

To the God of Abraham and Isaac. To the God that allowed the Son to be humbly born in a manger. To the God that was with Daniel as he chilled with no Netflix in the Lion’s Den. To the God that saw GIIIIILLIGAAAAAN off the island!

Let the church say….