Mologue of A Mathematician

It’s funny. As an expert in the area of mathematics, I can honestly say I eat, sleep, and live a life of numbers.

I had a dream last night that I was in a math class. It was just your typical Algebra course. The only thing that wasn’t typical was that the teacher was Black. And even further, he was a Black man that couldn’t control his class. It was mainly just two students though.

In my dream, they were ruining things for everybody. Because of them, the teacher ended up giving out a pop quiz. I saw some familiar faces in my dream and they were saying, “Chris, you’re gona take this, aren’t you? You’re not even in this class!” They knew that I would throw off their curve. Ironically enough, I actually did throw off their curve. I got a 100% and the next closest grade was an 82%.

The next class I came in late, because I was trying to decide whether or not I would even go. The teacher had already passed out the graded quizzes and asked me if I was Christopher Raglon. I’m assuming that he knew that, because he only had one paper left. Then he announced two things. First, he congratulated me on getting the top score in the class. Second, he announced that I wasn’t on his roll. Then he inquired of me as to whether or not that was a mistake. I told him no. Then I requested that he allow me to have 2 minutes of his class time. After that, I made my 2-minute address to the class.

For those of you who don’t know me, I feel confident saying that you will get to soon. My name is Christopher Raglon and as your teacher stated, I got the highest score on this pop quiz. Keep in mind that I did this and today is only my second day in this class. I noticed that there are two class clowns that seem to get yal into a lot of these pop quizzes. Well, I’m willing to counteract that action. As your teacher also stated, I’m not on his roll. He probably noticed when he tried to enter my grade. This is no mistake. I’m not on his roll, because I’m not enrolled in this class. I’m a math tutor. Now, don’t worry. I’m sure that your teacher will be willing to give yal the appropriate curve for this quiz. I’m here to let yal know that help is available. I charge fair prices and if you would like to request my services, I’ll be outside for awhile, after class. I’m willing to work with anybody, but the two class clowns.

Then I wrote my Twitter name (@TooDeepNot2Deep) on the drawing board, hung my perfect score quiz on the drawing board, and walked out.

I’m SO EXCITED and I Just Can’t Hide It!

I’ve got my eyes on food! Food’s everything that I see! I want a cup, plate, and a napkin in front of me! I can’t get over food! Just bring me something to eat! I want a cup, plate, and a napkin in front of me!

Okay. Okay. I was excited yal. I just came from the Doctor’s office and I got some blood work done. For those of you that are not familiar with getting your blood tested, that effectively means you can’t eat for a few hours (and by a few hours I mean 12 to 24 hours).

I was FAMISHED! I hadn’t eaten since about 10 last night and my appointment was at 3:30 p.m. I was irritable and impatient with people in traffic (even more than usual), my mouth would stay dry, and I was lackadaisical. I sang to my food you guys! I was in my car like “As sooooon as I get hoooome!” I’m excited! I’m excited! I’M EXCITED!!!!!

Okay, gotta go. See ya.

NOT How I Wanted To Start My Day

As I was backing out of the driveway, this cop passed me by. After I got a little way down the road, I looked in my mirror and saw the cop turning around. Did I panic, no? Fast-forward five seconds later and there were six police cars down the street. SIX!!!!! And they were all split on both sides of the street!

Now THIS made me nervous!!!!! Some of them were out of their cars and they started walking in the middle of the road as I pulled up.

What happened? Surprisingly nothing. Nothing at all. I guess every run in with the police doesn’t have to be bad. BUT sometimes you won’t have any woes to ride thru the SIX with.

Make it a great day people.

Kevin Durant Declares His Independence

What a CRAZY turn of events. For those of you that have been under a rock for the last day or so, Kevin Durant is taking his talents to…Venice Beach? Okay, not exactly Venice Beach, but you get the point. Kevin Durant couldn’t find “bae”, so he’s going to the Bay area? Alright, I’m done, but you can read more about what I’m referring to here. Some are calling Kevin Durant “weak“. Some folks are even going as far as to call Kevin Durant a “sellout“. I personally call him a winner.

Yes, Kevin Durant took what seems to be the easy way out; but can you blame him? It isn’t as if he hasn’t been in the trenches! Year after year AFTER YEAR in Oklahoma, Kevin Durant and the Thunder had SOMETHING keeping them from getting over the hump. Whether it was the inexperience of Kevin Durant, Scott Brooks, and Russell Westbrook against Gregg Popovich, Tim Duncan, and the legion. After they got over their inexperience, James Harden decided not to show up in the NBA Finals! Even further, Serge The Blocker and Kevin Durant had season ending injuries (in separate years).

In short, the Thunder have been known for winning games, but not winning championships. OKC has always seemed to have this unshakable stigma about them. They win 50 games, they consistently go to the Western Conference Finals, and (for whatever reason) they fizzle out. Brandy said it best, everybody knows that almost doesn’t count.

Personally, I thought Kevin Durant would stay in Oklahoma, but then this happened. Yep, Al Hordford signed to Boston. Boston. BOSTON. The Boston Celtics were a good young team last year (led by Isaiah Thomas) and with the addition of Al Horford, they have set themselves up to potentially be a top-5 seed in the Eastern Conference. With Kevin Durant joining Al Horford and Isaiah Thomas, the Boston Celtics would’ve given LeBron James a run for his money. But now (as I said before), Boston is still good; but not great.

Personally, I’m excited about this season. I’m happy for Kevin Durant, because this is a move that could change the “championship or bust” funk that he’s in currently. I’m a Kevin Durant fan and I like his game! The main difference I can see is that Kevin Durant won’t have to be cognizant of rushed shots or “bad” decisions (like he often would have to be in OKC with Russell Westbrook and later on Dion Waiters). His brand is about to go to the next level of Super Saiyan and as I said, I’m excited to see what the future of the NBA has for us.

Say what you will, but Kevin Durant showed us who he really is. He was loyal for an extremely long time and when he left the Oklahoma City Thunder, he left for wins (as opposed to money). He left AT LEAST $15 million on the table and for these reasons, I can respect his decision.

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